Betty Friedan, yes, but the Shakers? 

 

We think of Friedan’s The Feminine Mystique, in 1963, as the catalyst for the women’s movement.  Or, we may go back to the Suffragettes, from the 1920s.  But, did you know the United Society of Believers in Christ’s Second Appearing, better known as Shakers, set an elegant model for feminism and women’s equality – almost 200 years before?

 

In 1747, this group, who developed from the Quakers, came to New York under the leadership of Ann Lee. They became known, mockingly, as the Shakers, because their praying included dancing, shouting, singing, and shaking.

 

Nineteen communal settlements were established in New England and the mid-west.   One of the largest, counting over 300 members, was in Pleasant Hill, Kentucky.  Today, few of the original Shaker buildings survive.  This one, outside of Lexington, has become a museum.

 

Now, I’m not writing a history of the Shakers; I just want to share enough of their story to make my point about their setting a model for women’s equality.   Shakers believed in personal communication with a God who was both male and female.  Followers of Mother Ann came to believe  she embodied all the perfections of God in female form. They dedicated their lives to pursuing perfection and eradicating sin.   

 

This highly stoic and religious woman was arrested several times for disturbing the peace with her prayers (“shaking”) in an attempt to recruit new members.   She, like many women of the ‘60s, fought for her beliefs, taking a public stand.  And, she believed in hard work and keeping comfortably busy; every member learned a craft and did chores – men and women: the early version of equal pay for equal work.

 

Mother Ann Day is celebrated on the first Sunday of August.  By coincidence, Unique Retreats for Women Ready for Change is being held at Pleasant Hill’s Shaker Village two weeks later.  Perhaps we will honor her early message that women are equal to men and need to be treated as such.

 

During free time, UR Participants can explore this large restored settlement that has still has craftspeople carrying on the old skills.  In fact, we will be sleeping in their old quarters (modernized, of course).  But, for those interested, the original outhouse still stands!

 

One part of Mother Ann Day’s belief, though, we may not want to honor is celibacy.  Today, there are only 4 Shakers left.  But, back to the role model she set, perhaps we will discuss is how women can take control of their bodies, their sex lives, and the way they are treated (and respected) by men.

 

 

 

If you want more information about Unique Retreats for Women Ready for Change, August 14-16, 2009, feel free to contact me directly (513-542-0646) or check out the web site (UniqueRetreatsForWomen.com/Elephant.aspx).

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A friend recently sent me a video clip from Mark Gungor's comic routine on the difference between men's and women's brains. While delightfully funny, Mark also touches on real differences in the way men and women think, react and deal with situations. Mark is a pastor, comedian, author, musician and producer. He has DVDs available of his routine. You can check out a free sample of his "A Tale of Two Brains" on YouTube (be prepared to laugh -- a lot):  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GuMZ73mT5zM

Enjoy!
Karen

I want to share with you a short snippet from an interview I did with Kelly Rudolph about Personal Safety.  One of the issues that came up was that the term Personal Safety brings up images of Martial Arts, beaking boards with our bare knuckles and wearing japanese pajamas. This inaccurate picture may appeal to teenage boys, but not necessarily to everyone.

In this  4 minute snippet, Kelly compares Personal Safety with Self Defense and gives us a quick overview of what she means by Personal Safety. She is a very engaging speaker and I know you'll enjoy listening to her.

If you are interested in listening to the entire interview (for free), you still have time to register for the entire series Women Ready for Change. Once registered, you can download any or all 11 interviews in the series for free... but act quickly! They're only available for free until May 31, 2009.

Ciao!

Karen

Download | Duration: 00:04:14

Many of you have heard from me several times in the past 3 months about my FREE teleseminar series on Women Ready For Change. That series has been completed. The last one concluded on April 29th. We had over 140 women sign up.
 
This was a uniquely designed series of interviews just for women, focusing on so many aspects of women's lives.  There was plenty of timely & useful information for everyone. Topics ranged from girlfriends to creativity, personal safety, to writing, and lots more. 
The feedback from women who participated has been overwhelming.

I intend to compile this collection (over 11 hours) of interviews with women experts from various fields and offer them for sale to the public. Meanwhile everyone who has registered for the series has until May 31st to download their copy of the audio files for free.  During this time, the  registration page will still be active, too so that others may sign up for the free downloads... until May 31st.
  
So, if you have not had the pleasure of hearing these interviews, you have one more chance.  If you know a friend who would really enjoy hearing these, please let them know about it now. After May 31st, they will be available for sale, but until then you can download them for free. 

The audio files are in MP3 format, so you can listen to them on your computer, your IPod or any of the digital audio players available. You can read the full program with descriptions of all 11 interviews here.  But, Hurry. This offer is only available until May 31. 

Spring is the season to think about change.  Spring is also the season I ran my very first Unique Retreat for Women – back in 1996.  I can’t believe it’s been 13 years.

 

Retreats, in general, are a gift women give themselves. For a few days, they let go of their worries about home or work and just focus on themselves.

 

Unique Retreats for Women, though, is unique in the additional benefits it offers.  First, it includes a minimum of 15 hours of group discussion and innovative exercises.  They are specifically geared to help women clarify their personal goals, discover and address their individual issues, including ones they didn’t know they had. 

 

Women leave with plans for concrete action, having designed their own specific strategies to reach their goals – goals that only a few days ago they weren’t even aware they had.

 

Now, all retreats are exciting and exhilarating because of the intensity of being with caring women in a caring nurturing environment.  However, the glow from the weekend typically dissipates as women return to their daily lives.  To prevent that, Unique Retreats for Women unique has a built-in six month group follow-up (by telephone) to assure each woman maintains her momentum from the weekend.

 

Another unique aspect is the evening entertainment provided by Barbara Baxter, the gifted ventriloquist. Her “talking friends” tap into one underlying theme of each retreat, finding your own voice. 

 

The next Unique Retreat for Women: Women Ready for Change is coming up this summer – August 14-16.  If you’ve never been to the Lexington, Kentucky Bluegrass area or a laceName w:st="on">ShakerlaceName> laceType w:st="on">VillagelaceType>, this retreat will be a combination of vacation and personal growth, relaxation and internal excitement as you get clarity on what you need to move ahead in life as you wish.

 

In a season of tight economics how can you think about both a vacation and a personal growth experience, and lots of problem solving therapy (that isn’t therapy)?  Easy, Unique Retreats provides it all.

I received this comment from an Always Single Woman:

The worst thing about being single is missing out on life.  Once all your friends marry, it

becomes a “couples” world…singles excluded.  Your friends have kids and socialize with

other couples with kids.  Even when yo get together with girl friends, the topics are husbands,

kids, etc.  and you feel alone. …I’m basically no different now at 46 gthan I as in high schoo

…except older.

The issue of married friends excluding single is real and unkind.  Although, I doubt any of them are aware of being unkind.  While it may be uncomfortable, it is up to the single women to raise the topic.  This is one way to separate out those who are true friends from those who were just social users when single.  A true friend is likely to be surprised at your feeling excluded.  Or, she may be protecting you from being uncomfortable with her family or married friends.  She needs to hear that you want her to invite you and you decide, each time, whether or not you are comfortable being included.

 

This issue of being a 3^rd or 5^th wheel is real.  And, it is also NOT real.  You make it what you want it to be.  If you let them lead the conversation, you probably will feel left out. Married women might be delighted, though, to have someone get them talking about anything other than children and husbands.  Be pro-active.  What makes single women feel so bad often is allowing themselves to take a back seat.

She later added:

“ I think I'm in the middle of a huge mid-life ‘always been single’ pity party.  And I know I should appreciate all I have when I have it.  Most of the time I do; it’s what gets me through the slumps.  I hope the pity party ends soon....I'm just feeling I missed out on a lot.”

 

There’s no way anyone should try to make you feel good about being single.  Your friends have a life style (husband and children) that you want.  While I firmly believe that women can live fine without a mate, if you really want one, then of course you feel sad, maybe even betrayed by the old promise that if you live right, you’d get the white picketed fence and armored prince.

 

Unfortunately, that was a false promise since there is no guarantee about love and mating.  You can’t make an appropriate man appear.  You could make children appear if you want to be a mother.  My book, With or Without A Man has a chapter devoted entirely to that question.

 

Many women who have always been single feel their life has not changed since they were younger while their friends have moved on to marriage and parenthood.  They long for a life style they feel they have missed.  That is true.  No one should try to talk you out of that.  However, in addition to being aware what you have missed, you might also want to think about what advantages and experiences you have had by virtue of not being married. 

 

For example, as an Always Singles, you may have

1. lived more exciting lives
2. traveled
3. pursued career opportunities, and other activities
4. become more emotionally insightful, having time to focus on your own personal growth
5. learned about yourself in relationships through dating different men
6. become more assertive, learning to stand up for yourself
7. become more independent, not having a built-in man to take care of you.
8. had more than one great love, while your married friends have only had their husband.

 

 

Unlike some single authors, With or Without A Man doesn’t say being single is the best thing since peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.  And, unlike some authors, it doen’t say if you do something different with yourself, you will meet a man.  I think single women need to value their life as it currently is -- you what you have at the time you have it.  Tomorrow it may change.  The next day it may change back. 

 

 With or Without A Man:  Single Women Taking Control of Their Lives, together with the companion Workbook, offer specific suggestions how to think differently about being single.  Married or single, you don’t know what tomorrow brings.  Therefore, the only thing you can be certain about is what you are going to do with the life you have today.  If you are not using it to the maximum, feel good about yourself and fulfilled, then you have only yourself to blame – not the lack of a husband.   Married women often complain their lives are lacking something and if only they were single….

 

I say to them what I say to single women: Take control of your life – with or without a man.

Yesterday, I received an email from Patsy Harman, CNM MS, telling me about her new book:

The Blue Cotton Gown: A Midwife's Memoir , (Beacon Press, Oct. 2008).  Since it relates to so many of the important issues we women confront, I decided to pass along her email information.   

 

The Blue Cotton Gown, set in Appalachia, is not primarily about birth but about women giving birth to themselves.  It addresses such issues as postpartum depression, drug abuse, teen pregnancy, menopause, mother-guilt, infertility, domestic violence, transgender change, midlife sexuality, keeping a marriage together and the crisis in the US health care system.  

The Blue Cotton Gown is a work of the heart, a celebration of the courage of the ordinary woman and a tribute to all who struggle to survive with their souls intact.  I hope you like it.

So, check out her website (www.patriciaharman.com) to learn more about the book and what reviewers have said.

 

 

I've just gotten some information that may be of interest to you -- professionally and personally.

There will be three upcoming seminars -- two this Saturday and one in a few weeks.


    How To Grow Your Business In Today’s Economy,  March 7  FREE 90 minutes seminar
 
    How To Stimulate Your Career In Today’s Economy,  March 7, 1/2 day seminar

    How To Find a Loving, Lasting Relationship,  March 21, full day seminar


For information of any of them, contact

Bonita Brown
Executive, Business and Life Success Coach
Certified Mars Venus Coach
BonitaBrown@MarsVenusCoaching.com
1(866) 854 – 2593


 

.

I have the most exciting thing to share with you.

Starting next Wednesday, March 11, I initiate

an 8 week FREE teleseminar series on

Women Ready For Change.

 
I will have the great pleasure of interviewing some amazing women.

This is a uniquely designed series of interviews,

just for women, focusing on so many aspects of your

life.  There’s plenty for everyone, from girlfriends to

creativity, personal safety, to writing, and lots more.

Below, I have the title and dates of each interview. 

Get more details on the program description and the experts, 

Because this is such a great program, and I don’t want you to miss it, I

am offering a BONUS INTERVIEW you will get immediately upon registering: 

Mary Holsenbeck talks about You Really Can Make Lasting Changes in Your Life.

She will walk you through the 7 Stages of Change –  preparing you to use the great

information as you listen to the rest of this series.

WHEN: Wednesday, March 11

TIME: 5:00pm (PST), 8:00pm (EST) 

COST:  FREE

 

Don’t worry if some of the topics aren’t up your alley. 

Register anyway to make sure you can hear the ones that are. 

(Remember, the price is right!)  And, if you can’t make one of them, 

you can download a recording of it later.

So, hurry.    CLICK TO REGISTER

There’s also a Special Event just for Single Women

with an additional Bonus Interview with Lydia Lambert',

author of Kissing Frogs, The Path to to Prince

(See program description for more details of her interview)

 
The best part is that all of this is FREE.

This will be an exciting series, so I strongly encourage you (and tell your friends) to register now.

I know you’ll enjoy it.

Click Here to Register  and get your FREE Bonus Interview.

PROGRAM DESCRIPTION

All interviews start at 8:00pm (EST), 5:00pm (PST)  

Date:     Wednesday, March 11
Title:      Change Whining To Winning, and Laugh Along the Way

Expert:  January Jones, author of the book Thou Shalt Not Whine: The 11th Commandment

Date:     Wednesday, March 18
Title:      Life Is So Much Better With Girlfriends

Expert:  Debba Haupert, founder of Girlfriendology.com

Date:    Wednesday, March 25
Title:     Writing Change Into Your Life

Expert:  Cindy Barrilleaux, editor and writing coach, founder of WriteYourBest.com

Date:    Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Title:     Personal Safety for Life: Change Your Mind Set

Expert:  Kelly Rudolph, "Your Personal Safety Trainer," and CEO of SURVIVE!

Date:    Wednesday, April 8
Title:     Stirring Your Creative Juices at Midlife.

Expert:  Dotsie Bregel, founder of the National Association of Baby Boomer Women

Date:    Wednesday, April 15
Title:     Your Marriage: Make Good Even Better

Expert:  Dr. Beth Erickson, author of  Marriage Isn't For Sissies:

             7 Simple Keys to Unlocking the Best Part of Your Life

Date:    Wednesday, April 22
Title:     Make Time For Yourself: An Essential Change for Mothers

Expert:  Mia Redrick, author of Time for mom-ME: 5 Essential Strategies for a Mother’s Self-Care

Date:    Wednesday, April 29
Title:     Strategies for Surviving Your Divorce That Even Your Attorney Doesn't Know

Expert: Carol Ann Wilson, CFP, a leader in the field of divorce financial planning.


SPECIAL EVENT 

Date:   Tuesday, April 14
Title:    Changing Yourself, Changing Society’s Discrimination
Experts:  Bella DePaulo, author of Singled Out: How Singles Are Stereotyped, Stigmatized,
                           and Ignored and Still Live happily Ever After
            Sherry Langburt, founder of SingleEdition.com
            Karen Gail Lewis, author of With or Without A Man: Single Women Taking Control of Their Lives
               Wendy Wasson, founder of MySingleSpace.org


BONUS INTERVIEWS

Title:  You Really Can Make Lasting Changes in Your Life
Expert:  Mary Holsenbeck, founder of BubbaGirl.com.  

Title:  Kissing Frogs: The Path To A Prince
Expert:  Lydia Lambert, author of this hilariously true story of a princess with a quest,  

 

 

Hi, 

    I have the most exciting thing to share with you. Starting next Wednesday, a week today, I initiate an 8 week FREE teleseminar series on: 
                                            Women Ready For Change.
 
    I will have the great pleasure of interviewing some amazing women. This is a uniquely designed series of interviews, just for women, focusing on so many aspects of your life. There’s plenty for everyone, from girlfriends to creativity, personal safety, to writing, and lots more. ( Click Here to see the full program -- with dates, descriptions, and information about the experts) 

    Because I don’t want you to miss out on this great program, I am offering a BONUS INTERVIEW you will get immediately upon registering. 
Mary Holsenbeck talks about You Really Can Make Lasting Changes in Your Life. She will walk you through the 7 Stages of Change – preparing you to use the great information as you listen to the rest of this series. 

    So, put it on your calendar: the series starts -- a week today. 
    DATE: Wednesday, March 11 TIME: 5:00pm (PST), 8:00pm (EST) 
    COST: FREE 

    Don’t worry if some of the topics aren’t up your alley. Register anyway to make sure you can hear the ones that are. (Remember, the price is right!) And, if you can’t make one of them, you can download a recording of it later. 

    Hurry. CLICK TO REGISTER.

    There’s also a Special Event just for Single Women that has an additional Bonus Interview. ( See program description.)  

    The best part is that all of this is FREE. 

    This will be an exciting series, so I strongly encourage you (and tell your friends) to register now. I know you’ll enjoy it. 

     Click Here to Register and get your FREE Bonus Interview.